Did you ever play Seven Minutes in Heaven when you were a teenager? Where a random boy and girl get seven uninterrupted minutes in a closet together? It’s a game that has many of the same elements as a typical chairlift ride: seven minutes locked in a confined space, awkwardness, and learning way too much about another person.
The interesting thing about being on a chairlift (or gondola) is that typically, it’s a real crapshoot of companions. A whole whack of the Canadian population skis, from toddlerhood upwards. People you’d never normally converse with, or want to converse with. To help keep the conversation flowing, here’s a breakdown of all the unsolicited life advice you’re likely to receive. —ULISES DALTON